The Story Of Us

You probably heard the story a thousand times. You probably heard my wife’s version of the story. This is my version. I remember the year 2003.  A year I finally gave up on love. I came off all dating sites and decided that it was useless to chase after love. I decided once and for all that I won’t be looking for love. I took love off my radar. I came to the conclusion that I just wasn’t good at relationships. Somehow, I never seem to accomplish happy endings. Without the pressures of dating, I felt like I could be my true self and enjoy the single life.

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I was in my final semester of getting my Bachelor of Science degree. My plans were to get my degree and head back to Grenada, the island of my birth. The day was May 23 and I was heading to the Irving Mall. I had my windows in my car up and the radio was playing some of my favorite songs. I was singing at the top of my voice to “Can’t Let You Go” by Fabulous. Not only was I singing, but I was bumping my head back and forth to the rhythm. As I pulled into the parking lot of the mall, I look to the side of the car that pulled up next to me. I saw a woman in the driver’s seat and three young boys. They were laughing at me. I felt embarrassed. Who in their right mind would be singing and dancing in their car? Only a fool like me, I thought. I got out of my car and started to walk to the mall’s entrance. Then I looked back and there she was walking with the boys behind me. I had my first intense look at her. I saw her peace. I saw her eyes. I saw her nurse outfit. I saw her flawless makeup. Then I saw my entire generation, past and present moving in my direction. She was looking in my direction. A voice inside of me said that I should talk to her but I walked faster away from her. I was bent on keeping my promise of not looking for love. IMG_8906

I went into Barnes and Nobles and I suspected that they went into the movies. I sat down on a table to read my books and I couldn’t get her out of my head. I cursed myself for not introducing myself. What if I never see her again? I thought to myself. Then an idea struck me. I got up and left the store. I headed to the parking lot praying that her car was still parked next to mines. And there it was. I took out a page from my notepad and wrote on it. “Hi, if you are the nurse who was laughing at the guy who was singing in his car, I will like to speak to you.” I left my phone number. I stuck the note between her car wiper blades and drove back to my apartment and waited long agonizing hours. Then my phone rang and it was a stranger’s voice, It was her. She saw my note. She thought she had received a police ticket and was relieved when she read it. She thought it was cute, so she called. It turned out we were neighbors and lived a block from each other.

We agreed to meet for a drink at On The Border Restaurant. We were at the table and her son accidentally spilled a jug of cold water into my lap. I kept my calm. I shook the water off and asked the waiter for another table. After dinner, we met for a moonlight walk in our neighborhood. I asked her about 50 questions and she answered them all. And then I did something stupid. I told her I was going to marry her. She didn’t answer, but she disappeared.

I believe in love at first sight. I also believe that a lot of errors came with that belief, but I felt that I was right this time just like the other times I misjudged it. Three days had passed and I didn’t hear from her. I left numerous messages and she didn’t return my calls. I was in stalker mode and I felt bad and stupid at the same time. I cursed myself for saying I was going o marry this stranger. It sounded as bad as if I had said that I was going to eat her for dinner.

On the 26th of May, her birthday, I found an excuse to visit her home unannounced. I bought a bottle of champagne, Orchid flowers, and a cake. I knocked on her door. She wouldn’t answer. At the pleading of her son, who was more interested in the cake, she opened the door. I had one last chance to prove that I wasn’t a psycho.

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The things I learned about marriage is that it is a commitment. People change over time and it takes patience in addition to the commitment to journey through the changes. People need their space even in marriage. We are totally different and that’s OK. But the most important thing I learned is that we are connected in spirit, mind, body, and soul and that’s sacred and it is worth committing to.

I remember lying sick in bed. It was about a month, I believe in our relationship. She came to visit me. I told her that I wanted to talk to her. She thought I was breaking up with her. I thanked her for being with me in health and in sickness. The conversation sounded Shakespearean with a touch of Hallmark but at the end, I asked her to marry me. She said, “Yes.”

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Fifteens years later, here we are still married and still committed to each other and raising our family and building our legacy. God has been good to us. The story of us.

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Three Breathing Exercises To Restore Your Health

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Some of my writings may seem repetitious but I believe at some point the message will resonate. There is a saying that “repetition is the mother of learning.” Today, I’m focusing on three simple breathing exercises that will restore your health. I believe that many health issues are the result of a broken spirit and today I will focus on restoration.

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The first breathing exercise focuses on the full length and journey of our breath. Find a comfortable spot. I normally choose my recliner when I’m doing these exercises. You don’t have to but be sure to be relaxed and comfortable. Take a deep breath and imagine that you have eyes within you that is watching the journey of the oxygen within that breath moving through your nostrils, into your throat, and entering into your lungs. See your lungs expanding to full capacity, then exhale. Repeat the process for 15 to 30 minutes. Doing this process narrows the focus of your thoughts on visualizing the process of breathing. There should be no other distracting thoughts. If you are distracted, refocus until you can see the full journey of your breath.

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The second breathing exercise focuses on someone that you love, past or present. Focus on the areas of their life that you admire most and smile while doing so. Start breathing with that person on your mind. Think of their humility, kindness, passion for life, their love for you and others, the difference they made in the world just by being there, and the life lessons they’ve thought you. Smile as you think of them. Keep breathing and keep smiling. You may feel distracted at times but just refocus on the person you chose. Try this for 15 minutes.

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The third breathing exercise focuses on you. See yourself in the future living to the lifestyle that you want to experience. Be specific. For example, you are a successful screenwriter or a  professional photographer with a celebrity clientele. Think big but be authentic in your choice. Don’t see yourself as a pilot if you have no interest in flying a plane. Smile as you follow the journey of your successful life. See yourself receiving awards for your works. See yourself on a stage thanking those who supported you and made it possible for your success. See the crowds applauding you and showing appreciation for your work. This part of the exercise should last about 15 minutes. Keep smiling and keep breathing.

In this exercise, I thought you to visually follow your breath, focus on a loved one past or present, and breathe your authentic self into existence. The process lasted about 1 hour. Coming out of it, spread your arms wide and take a deep breath. You may feel a bit light headed at first but you will feel refreshed. For maximum success, the process should be repeated daily. Enjoy your healthy living.

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If the writings are beneficial to you and you want to support the work of the writer, you can hit the donate button, or purchase any of his current books. Click on the links below.

 

Five Hip-Hop Songs To Knock You Into Shape

It took me 6 months to get my body into the shape I can be proud of, but it will be unfair for me to take credit for my hard work and not give credit to the songs that bent me back into shape.

A wide variety of songs have played a role in knocking me back into shape, but I will focus on 5 Hip-Hop songs that got the job done.

No. 5.

Pusha T – If You Know You Know

Pusha T starts off with a sleepy Rap monologue that effectively sets the tone of the song to jump off and when the music finally joins in, it captivates you and keeps you bouncing around as you get in shape. This is a classic melody for working out to and Pusha T has the right mindset and tone of voice in this song to get the job done.

No. 4

G-Eazy – 1942 ft. Yo Gotti, YBN Nahmir

Coming from the Soundtrack of “Uncle Drew,” if you stayed for the credit, you would have heard this Rap which to me is worth the wait. 1942 makes my list of workout songs. The melody is so addictive that it bounces you around whether you are bouncing or not. Yo Gotti kicks this off with a short croaky monologue before the melody kicks in taking you on a high. G-Eazy then brings his confident smooth floor before Yo Gotti comes back like a ball of fire. Whether you are on the Basketball court or in the gym, 1942 will knock you into shape.

No. 3

APES**T – THE CARTERS

Apes**t gives you the feeling like you are lost in the Vatican as it starts with the sound of church bells and sirens but slowing the music eases over the vocals of Ape Ape Ape monologue and you know you about to go Ape-shit. Why? Because Beyonce is going to get you. Queen B keeps this song busy with vocals that sound its intent from the get-go. This song is so captivating that even during the sudden pauses in the melody, you’ll be itching to dance. Then with an “Arrrw” the music comes back in and sweeps you off the floor and then here comes Jay-Z in the peak of his form knocking you around in an ecstasy of Rap. Apes**t will knock you into shape whether you want to or not. You will knock your brains out dancing to this.

No. 2

Drake – In My Feelings

I really believe Drake dreamt this melody because it is so flawless that it could have only come from a dream. OK, so you get a warm up to the video as Drake confronts KeKe in some routine humor, but hey! this is a video so we can expect that. Then like an easy orgasm, the music hits you and builds you up to a chant of “Let’s go let’s go.” Then you are the mercy of Drake smoothly crooning over this captivating rhythm that will leave you begging for more. This is a Ghetto love song and the video does it perfect justice. “In My Feeling” has so many layers for you to lose yourself in that it is definitely on the top of my workout list.

No. 1

A$AP Rocky – Praise The Lord (Da Shine) (Official Video) ft. Skepta

So we’re up to the No. 1 song that has knocked me into shape and this Rap is so cool that it will have you praising the Lord and cursing at the same time. The song starts off with an easy flute sound before the rhythm builds into an easy jump-back melody. The song definitely gives you the feeling of DMX and it does a great job of keeping you in that frame of mind while bouncing you around and back into shape. You can keep this on replay for 20 minutes and by then you will be in perfect shape.

Stop, Listen, Start

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There are three steps I take whenever I start my day. I stop, listen, then start. I call it the resetting phase of my life. I stop my thoughts. I listen to my breathing, then after an hour or two, I start my day.

Stopping is the first step to reset my day.

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I put a halt to all my thoughts that have built up from the previous day up to that moment. I lay in my recliner or some comfortable position.

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Then I listen to the sound of my breathing. I listen to my breath as it goes through my nostrils, into my chest and down to my stomach. By focusing on the sound of my breathing, I drown out any thoughts that are not affiliated with my breath. In minutes, I feel the walls of emotional resistance coming down exposing and reducing my level of stress. This is what I call the recharging phase. It’s like watching a battery in charge mode, every breath brings me one step closer to being fully charged. It normally takes a battery up to an hour to fully charge and similarly, I need that time frame to fully recharge my body.

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I undergo numerous emotional changes through the listening phase from feeling light-headed to a restoration of calm. The listening phase gives me the clarity I need to start my day.

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Once I feel totally recharged, I start my day, doing the things I enjoy the most only to repeat the process of the stop, listen, and start as my energy level runs low.

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To stop, listen, and start will give you clarity of thought which will help discover the true essence of who you are. Try it sometime.

 

Temporary Tourists

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An Unchained Mind Minute:
We’re all tourists in this temporary journey called life and the love we express and experience on this journey, shapes the memories we leave with.

How we show compassion, how we greet kindness, how we show appreciation, and how we give thanks are all part of the equation of the love experience.

It also entails how we make the difference in the lives of others, the most vulnerable, and those that cry out for our love and guidance.
We are just tourists on a temporary journey, enjoy it, but leave it better than we met it.

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An Unchained Mind Minute – The Dual Life

An Unchained Mind Minute:
The dual nature of life.
There is a saying that life is not fair, and it isn’t, but it gives us the ability to respond to things we deem unfair. It also rewards us with the emotions we attach to. For example, the loss of a friend or loved one can leave us angry or it can fill us with love and compassion and beautiful memories. We get to choose.
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There are many emotions in life and each brings an automatic response from within us and dictate our state of mind. Being angry with another person only hands over what control we have to that person. It becomes a double whammy. Holding a grudge against someone only leaves a self-destructive ache in our hearts.
Life is dual in nature and luckily we control the power to choose the state of our emotions. Do it lovingly, be compassionate, express humility and forgive yourself in the process.

Sadmon’s Run Author Ricardo Williams – Book Available at Amazon

When a couple of fun-loving animals from Paradise Jungle rescues an outsider from Dark Jungle, never did they realize that he would force himself to be the leader of the pact. Now the only question is how quickly can they eliminate him before he turns their paradise into a permanent nightmare. This is the story of Sadmon’s Run.

Sadmon’s Run is the first book in the “Thought-catcher’s Series. It teaches kids how to control their thoughts and the overriding message is the dangers of greed. Available on Amazon. Buy it now and be part of the vision of Sadmon’s Run the Movie.