The 10-Second Stress Rule

Many of the wounds that carry deep hurt within us were done to us by others, but if we focus on those that have hurt us and not on the wound, we will always be wounded and we will do the things wounded people do. That is, wounded people hurt others. Think of it this way, what if you stepped on a nail? For a few moments, you may be angry with the nail. but after a couple of days, you will focus your attention on the hurt and not on the nail.

Growing up in the rural areas of Grenada, my grandparents use to wake us up at 5:30 AM to go weed the garden so that the crops could grow in abundance. We were not going to focus on the wind that brought the weeds. Our focus was on the weeds themselves. Has someone hurt you in the past? If so, treat them like the wind and change your focus to remove the weeds of hurt that is preventing you from flourishing into a beautiful abundant garden. Try the 10-Second Stress Rule to remove deeply embedded emotional hurt. The first step is to breathe in mentally pushing your breath to the count of 10. The second step is to breathe out mentally pushing your breath to the count of 10. Repeat the process until you’ve completed 10 reps. The emotional weeds within you should disappear or be minimized after the 10th rep. Repeat the process at least three times a week.

The focus of hurt should never be on the person that causes you to hurt. The focus should be on the hurt within you and removing it using the 10-Second Stress Rule. Remember hurt people hurt people. Take the time to free yourself from the weeds that bind your growth.

A Comedy Show Like No Other

Recently I got the chance to chat with Carl Jones about his upcoming Valentine’s Day Comedy Show at the AA Event Center in Dallas TX. I wanted to know about Mr. Roger That, a spontaneously funny comedian who can crack up an audience just be sitting in his car during a LIVE feed and yawning. He is a Comedian that has a thorough understanding of how women think. It is not surprising that women make up about 90% of his followers. The idea of having the rug pulled from under leaves them laughing and wanting to hear more. For men in the audience, nothing benefits them more than getting a clear understanding of the devious ways women think and analyze things as exposed by Mr. Roger That.

Ricardo Williams: Carl, what can people expect from Mr. Roger That Comedy Show?

Carl Jones: Mr. Roger That is very raw & funny. He has been entertaining audiences for the past 3 years starting out making videos initially on Facebook. Now Mr. Roger That has built a following up of over 400,000 on social media. When people come out to see Mr. Roger That Live they get comedy at it’s best with an interactive show.

Ricardo Williams: I have to say in watching and listening to Mr. Roger That, he seems to connect perfectly with the mind of women. He connects with their deepest thoughts. The kind of thoughts women think, but won’t tell it to their man, but reveal it through their actions.

Carl Jones: Exactly right. He offers tips to women on how to keep your man satisfied and he is transparent regarding many issues of the day.

Ricardo Williams: What can we expect from Mr. Roger That in the future?

Carl Jones: We are putting together a compilation DVD this year showcasing his work and you can expect a lot of his new products such as Gloss line, shirts, and other clothing.

Ricardo Williams: How did the name Mr. Roger That come about?

Carl Jones: “Now you Roger That” is the punch line he uses after every joke and somehow, it caught on and the audience loves shouting it back at him. He is also known as the Queen of Shade.

Ricardo Williams: I have a feeling that Valentine’s Day is going to be really special because of this show.

Carl Jones: It sure will. We have a wide range of talented comedians. The admission is $20 in advance and $35 at the door. We offer a VIP ticket at $40 where you get to meet and converse with the comedians. The show will be held at the AA Event Center at 11601 Plano Road #120, Dallas TX 75243. Doors open at 7 PM and Showtime begins at 8 PM. Spread the word around. It is going to be a blast.

An Excerpt From My Book Unchained Mind – The Power Of Human Kindness

We can be thankful for every gift God has given us. Though it may not seem like a lot, it will multiply when we release it into the universe.

When our gift is in harmony with our kindness, it may change one person’s life for the better. There is no greater power in this world than the power of human kindness. There is no greater destructive power in this world than the power of human unkindness.

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Human kindness builds our heavenly experience, while human unkindness builds our hellish experience. We get to affect each person’s existence through our actions. So choose wisely. The universe is watching. The universe is responding. You owe it to yourself to make this journey through life a good experience not only for you but for others.

The Occupants

After every night’s sleep, as we open our eyes, as we take our first conscious breath, the occupants are waiting on the outside to take up residence within us. We feel the pain and discomfort as thoughts come rushing in. We feel the weight and burden of the baggage the occupants deposit. The weight of failure. The weight of not good enough. The weight of an uncertain future and uncertain finances. As it weighs us down the reality of its discomfort take a toll on our mental state.


The occupants won’t pay a rent or mortgage. It won’t bring peace of mind. It wreaks havoc on everything in its path. It wears us down and burns us out. It captures, evicts and subjects us to a feeling of pain without pleasure. It torments our soul. It renders us powerless. But we’re not. We can take back the power. Follow these steps.

Be aware. Being aware allows to acknowledge and identify the occupants that are causing us emotional discomfort.


Be silent. Silence allows us to confront and shed the baggage of destructive thoughts. Silence here doesn’t only mean being away from noise or keeping our mouths shut, it, however, focuses on the silence of thoughts. To do so, we focus only on our breathing.

Breathe Deeply. Breathing deeply allows us to flush out the occupants on the inside and replace it with our natural breath of life. Our conscious breathing allows our mind to create healthy thoughts of a love of self and peace within filled with kindness and compassion towards ourselves and others.


Stretch and groan. Stretching allows us to embrace our borders and in the process of us expanding ourselves and embracing our outer reach, our spontaneous groaning expells any negative energy from within us. Stretching our arms and holding the position until we feel totally at peace with ourselves is the final phase of removing and replacing the destructive occupants that show up in our first wake with the occupants we desire.


Now that we’ve achieved our desired occupants, we are tasked with nurturing and serving them. Nurture each breath with love, peace, optimistic prayers, and silence. Do intermittent stretches. Do these things and you will have a greater control of your emotions than if you did nothing at all.

If the writings are beneficial to you and you want to support the work of the writer, you can hit the donate button, or purchase any of his current books. Click on the links below.



A Brother Like No Other

I had mix feelings about having a big brother, one that thought me to play cricket as a right-hander even though I was left-handed. As early as I could remember, we were opposite in many ways. I wanted his dark curly hair and he wanted by my rough wooly hair. He wanted an Afro and I just wanted to slick my hair down and put a path in it.


He introduced me to bodybuilding. We used to go to the old gym in Tanteen and lift all types of heavy iron and metal. In those days, there were no thread mills or electronic machine for workouts. It was pure iron for muscles. I wore a shirt size smaller to enhance my skinny body. Wayne, on the other hand, had muscles.


Wayne got in trouble one time as far as I could remember. He pulled a prank on me. We used to walk down Green Street to empty our thrash in the dumpster and that day it had rained heavily. On our way home, Wayne pointed at an object under a tree and asked me to go fetch it and when I stood under the tree, he shook the branches and soaked me. He went off laughing while I was screaming my head off. Mom spanked him and he was upset. I remember him quoting a Jimmy Cliff song title when he told Mom, “Time will tell.” I took it to mean that he would see better days, and he did.


Wayne had a passion for photography and meteorology, but it was his love for theater that brought the crowds to his stage performances. I sat proudly in the audience trying to make sense of each play and loved them all.


We had different taste in women. Wayne liked dark-skinned women, and I light-skinned women. It was evident in the way we were attached to our favorite aunts. He was close to Auntie Alice and I was close to Auntie Clara (Lord Rest her Soul in Peace). He married the perfect woman and so did I.


My brother, for all the times you stood by me when I was wrong., and for all the fights you fought to protect me, and finally, for the great memories of our lives together, may God continue to guide you and bless you on this day and for years to come. Happy birthday to you.


The Story Of Us

You probably heard the story a thousand times. You probably heard my wife’s version of the story. This is my version. I remember the year 2003.  A year I finally gave up on love. I came off all dating sites and decided that it was useless to chase after love. I decided once and for all that I won’t be looking for love. I took love off my radar. I came to the conclusion that I just wasn’t good at relationships. Somehow, I never seem to accomplish happy endings. Without the pressures of dating, I felt like I could be my true self and enjoy the single life.


I was in my final semester of getting my Bachelor of Science degree. My plans were to get my degree and head back to Grenada, the island of my birth. The day was May 23 and I was heading to the Irving Mall. I had my windows in my car up and the radio was playing some of my favorite songs. I was singing at the top of my voice to “Can’t Let You Go” by Fabulous. Not only was I singing, but I was bumping my head back and forth to the rhythm. As I pulled into the parking lot of the mall, I look to the side of the car that pulled up next to me. I saw a woman in the driver’s seat and three young boys. They were laughing at me. I felt embarrassed. Who in their right mind would be singing and dancing in their car? Only a fool like me, I thought. I got out of my car and started to walk to the mall’s entrance. Then I looked back and there she was walking with the boys behind me. I had my first intense look at her. I saw her peace. I saw her eyes. I saw her nurse outfit. I saw her flawless makeup. Then I saw my entire generation, past and present moving in my direction. She was looking in my direction. A voice inside of me said that I should talk to her but I walked faster away from her. I was bent on keeping my promise of not looking for love. IMG_8906

I went into Barnes and Nobles and I suspected that they went into the movies. I sat down on a table to read my books and I couldn’t get her out of my head. I cursed myself for not introducing myself. What if I never see her again? I thought to myself. Then an idea struck me. I got up and left the store. I headed to the parking lot praying that her car was still parked next to mines. And there it was. I took out a page from my notepad and wrote on it. “Hi, if you are the nurse who was laughing at the guy who was singing in his car, I will like to speak to you.” I left my phone number. I stuck the note between her car wiper blades and drove back to my apartment and waited long agonizing hours. Then my phone rang and it was a stranger’s voice, It was her. She saw my note. She thought she had received a police ticket and was relieved when she read it. She thought it was cute, so she called. It turned out we were neighbors and lived a block from each other.

We agreed to meet for a drink at On The Border Restaurant. We were at the table and her son accidentally spilled a jug of cold water into my lap. I kept my calm. I shook the water off and asked the waiter for another table. After dinner, we met for a moonlight walk in our neighborhood. I asked her about 50 questions and she answered them all. And then I did something stupid. I told her I was going to marry her. She didn’t answer, but she disappeared.

I believe in love at first sight. I also believe that a lot of errors came with that belief, but I felt that I was right this time just like the other times I misjudged it. Three days had passed and I didn’t hear from her. I left numerous messages and she didn’t return my calls. I was in stalker mode and I felt bad and stupid at the same time. I cursed myself for saying I was going o marry this stranger. It sounded as bad as if I had said that I was going to eat her for dinner.

On the 26th of May, her birthday, I found an excuse to visit her home unannounced. I bought a bottle of champagne, Orchid flowers, and a cake. I knocked on her door. She wouldn’t answer. At the pleading of her son, who was more interested in the cake, she opened the door. I had one last chance to prove that I wasn’t a psycho.


The things I learned about marriage is that it is a commitment. People change over time and it takes patience in addition to the commitment to journey through the changes. People need their space even in marriage. We are totally different and that’s OK. But the most important thing I learned is that we are connected in spirit, mind, body, and soul and that’s sacred and it is worth committing to.

I remember lying sick in bed. It was about a month, I believe in our relationship. She came to visit me. I told her that I wanted to talk to her. She thought I was breaking up with her. I thanked her for being with me in health and in sickness. The conversation sounded Shakespearean with a touch of Hallmark but at the end, I asked her to marry me. She said, “Yes.”


Fifteens years later, here we are still married and still committed to each other and raising our family and building our legacy. God has been good to us. The story of us.


Three Breathing Exercises To Restore Your Health


Some of my writings may seem repetitious but I believe at some point the message will resonate. There is a saying that “repetition is the mother of learning.” Today, I’m focusing on three simple breathing exercises that will restore your health. I believe that many health issues are the result of a broken spirit and today I will focus on restoration.


The first breathing exercise focuses on the full length and journey of our breath. Find a comfortable spot. I normally choose my recliner when I’m doing these exercises. You don’t have to but be sure to be relaxed and comfortable. Take a deep breath and imagine that you have eyes within you that is watching the journey of the oxygen within that breath moving through your nostrils, into your throat, and entering into your lungs. See your lungs expanding to full capacity, then exhale. Repeat the process for 15 to 30 minutes. Doing this process narrows the focus of your thoughts on visualizing the process of breathing. There should be no other distracting thoughts. If you are distracted, refocus until you can see the full journey of your breath.


The second breathing exercise focuses on someone that you love, past or present. Focus on the areas of their life that you admire most and smile while doing so. Start breathing with that person on your mind. Think of their humility, kindness, passion for life, their love for you and others, the difference they made in the world just by being there, and the life lessons they’ve thought you. Smile as you think of them. Keep breathing and keep smiling. You may feel distracted at times but just refocus on the person you chose. Try this for 15 minutes.


The third breathing exercise focuses on you. See yourself in the future living to the lifestyle that you want to experience. Be specific. For example, you are a successful screenwriter or a  professional photographer with a celebrity clientele. Think big but be authentic in your choice. Don’t see yourself as a pilot if you have no interest in flying a plane. Smile as you follow the journey of your successful life. See yourself receiving awards for your works. See yourself on a stage thanking those who supported you and made it possible for your success. See the crowds applauding you and showing appreciation for your work. This part of the exercise should last about 15 minutes. Keep smiling and keep breathing.

In this exercise, I thought you to visually follow your breath, focus on a loved one past or present, and breathe your authentic self into existence. The process lasted about 1 hour. Coming out of it, spread your arms wide and take a deep breath. You may feel a bit light headed at first but you will feel refreshed. For maximum success, the process should be repeated daily. Enjoy your healthy living.

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If the writings are beneficial to you and you want to support the work of the writer, you can hit the donate button, or purchase any of his current books. Click on the links below.